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9:09 – 11 plays, 11 rushes, 1 touchdown. If Wisconsin doesn’t have to pass, this game isn’t going to stay competitive for very long.
9:15 – With 7:55 remaining in the opening quarter, the first forward pass is thrown by Purdue—an incompletion.
9:16 – Keith Smith caught that ball and lost it before he was down; this should be an easy review for the officials.
9:19 – That’s it, fire every replay official in college football. Purdue retains possession and punts, which pins Wisconsin down inside their own five yard line. Some seventy yards of field position was sacrificed because of reviewing incompetence.
9:23 – Wisconsin throws it’s first pass—an incompletion; there has yet to be a completed pass more than halfway through the quarter.
9:29 – With 5:23 remaining, a pass is finally completed by the Boilermakers—about as short a screen as Joey Elliott could throw. Neither team has done anything in the passing game; the only difference, though, is that Wisconsin hasn’t had to.
9:33 – John Clay is a pretty fast running back considering he weighs around 250 pounds; the Boilermaker defense is getting outmuscled and outran right now.
9:34 – There is Wisconsin’s first completion with 2:34 left; fittingly, it came off of play action because the Badgers’ rushing attack has been stellar thus far. This will be an easy day for the home team if yards on the ground keep coming this easily.
9:37 – END FIRST QUARTER. WISCONSIN LEADS 7-0.
9:41 – Wisconsin puts together another long, time-consuming drive that ends in a field goal; this is looking like one of the most comfortable 10-0 leads you will ever see.
9:43 – Back in the studio, Wendy Nix, while showing a highlight from the Indiana-Iowa game, just called Indiana “Wisconsin”—twice. Is she the replay official too?
9:46 – The screen has been the best play for the Purdue offense so far; that’s not saying much considering all the stuffed runs and dropped passes, but the Boilermakers need to find some way to get an offensive rhythm going while they’re still in the game.
9:48 – Purdue should go for this 4th and 2; Carson Wiggs would be kicking into the wind from some 47 yards.
9:49 – A quarterback rollout to the short side of the field? The pass was caught, but Aaron Valentin landed out of bounds; both feet came down simultaneously and one was out. Purdue didn’t necessarily have to run on that play, but the call didn’t allow enough time for anything to develop.
9:59 – What was Elliott looking at there? It wasn’t like Devin Smith came out of nowhere to pick that pass off; he had Valentin covered like a blanket and the ball was thrown right to him.
10:02 – Clay powers over the goal line for his second touchdown and the Badgers are sitting pretty right now. Purdue has to score on this upcoming drive or they might as well go home during halftime.
10:08 – That was Purdue’s worst drive yet; Elliott misfired a screen pass on first down, threw a second down pass into the ground, and had another pass dropped on third down. Can it get any worse for the Boilermakers?
10:08 – Yes…yes it can get worse for the Boilermakers because it just did.
10:19 – As long as they don’t muff the punt, Purdue should just run out the clock and get to the locker room; the Boilermakers haven’t done anything else to stop the bleeding
10:23 – Purdue doesn’t run out the clock and gets into hail mary range, but only to see Elliott accidently scramble across the line of scrimmage and have to run out of bounds to end the half. Wow.
10:24 – HALFTIME. WISCONSIN LEADS 24-0.
10:27 – That was one of the worst halves of football a team could possibly play; Purdue got absolutely dominated in all phases of the game. Wisconsin has looked more like the team that started the season 5-0.
10:47 – Two more drops on Purdue’s first drive of the second half brings the total to six. Elliott’s passer rating is taking a huge hit in this game and little of it is his fault.
10:50 – A tight end (Lance Kendricks) takes a reverse and outruns an entire secondary for a fifty-four yard gain. Only in this game, folks.
10:51 – Clay clearly fumbled that ball before he was down and it looks like the ball was still in the end zone when he regained possession; this should be his third touchdown of the day.
10:53 – It’s a miracle! The replay crew gets a call right!
11:04 – Wisconsin puts another drive together and extends their lead. At this point, Purdue should just leave and get home to see if The Great Pumpkin will arise in their pumpkin patch. (Let’s face it, Charlie Brown and the gang would’ve given Wisconsin a better fight today.)
11:09 – The seventh drop by a Purdue receiver; that group has had the hand-eye coordination of the living dead today. (Yep, I’m reduced to making Halloween-related jokes to try and keep this report interesting.)
11:23 – Al-Terek McBurse fumbles by banging the ball against his thigh; the Boilermakers can’t even look forward to the future at this point.
11:26 – END THIRD QUARTER. WISCONSIN LEADS 34-0.
11:33 – Backup quarterback Curt Phillips gets in on the act by leading another scoring drive for the Badgers. Heck, put the swamp monster in there; he’d probably be able to elude the Boilermaker defense.
11:42 – An interception by Purdue! The Boilermaker defense did something!
11:44 – Purdue commits drop number eight; they must not want to avoid the shutout.
11:48 – The Badger D holds on 4th and Goal and keeps the shutout intact; not kicking a field just for sake of getting on the scoreboard is the only noble thing the Boilermaker offense has done all game.
12:01 – GAME OVER. WISCONSIN WINS 37-0.
This game requires little in-depth or expert analysis because anyone who watched it could see why it went the way it did. Wisconsin simply dominated in every statistical aspect imaginable and it all started with that masterful opening drive where they scored a touchdown without passing the ball. This was definitely the team who started 5-0 that showed up today.
It would be easy to say that Purdue looked like a bunch of amateurs out there, but, technically, every single person who plays college football is an amateur. Nonetheless, the Boilermakers were totally outclassed and did themselves no favors with those eight dropped passes. It’s hard to believe this was the same squad that upset Ohio State two weeks ago.
Fitting that Purdue chose Halloween to come dressed as a completely different football team.